Fool!

I'm a fool!

When am I going to wake up?

D&D 2009

Went to my company's D&D dinner at Orchard Hotel on Sat. This hotel is jinxed for me! When we went for the D&D at the same hotel 2 years ago, I got dragged up the stage to do some sexy Indian dance. It wasn't even supposed to me....but never mind.

This time round, I completely sia suay 3 times...each time more serious than the last. And with poor, unsuspecting victims too!

Sia suay 1

Lian came to pick me up at my place in a cab and when we were almost there, I asked, "Uncle 到了没有?" She mumbled something and I didn't really catch it. A few minutes later, when the cab was turning into the hotel lobby, I asked the same question again "Uncle 到了没有?" . She stared at me blankly, and the taxi uncle turned around, gestured with his hand in front and said slightly exasperatingly "neh, 到了loh!" Lian then said, slightly embarassed, "aiyo 你要问几次?" I then realised what was going on and half laughing, explained that I was asking her if Edward, whom we affectionately called "Uncle" had reached (in case he got msged her or anything). I wasn't asking the taxi uncle the "Are we there yet?" question!!! LOL! Both the taxi uncle and Lian started laughing...and both of us were still laughing after we got off the cab..haha.

Sia suay 2

This one was very bad. It had the effect of me considering whether to go back home on the spot and even to skip work for a few days.

Outside the ballroom, there were some activities going on. In a much smaller, adjacent ballroom, we could take free photos superimposed on some backgrounds. It was only when I stepped into this room that I saw a man with a gigantic, yellow python swung around his neck! I gave a whoops and backed out again. I AM TERRIFIED OF ALL REPTILES. Yes, scaly reptiles! Especially snakes! But Lian said we dun need to have the snake with us if we didn't want to. So I gingerly tried to make my way into the room again, keeping both my eyes fixed on the big python. Big mistake, cos the next thing I know, I saw Edward walking towards us with a smaller, but equally horrifying green snake around his hands!!!

What happened next happened quickly and I didn't hear my own bloodcurdling scream until I bumped into a group of gals. Apparently I was backing and pushing my way out of the room frantically, and one of the gals shook me out of my shock by rudely giving me a rough nudge and said "Hey girl, don't do that can!!". I was still too shocked to take in her rude tone (usually, I would have told her off, the bitch!). And few seconds later, someone tapped me gently on the shoulder and I turned and saw YZ, my classmate from my course asking me, amused, why did I scream so loud. I think I must have been blabbering and pointing to the snake...but at the same time Lian was calling me into the room again and he gave me a slight push towards the room and asked me to go take some photos. Needless to say, I didn't look good in it. Sigh.

Edward, don't do that again ah! I got a most terrible fright! Not to mention terribly sia suaying myself in front of half my company! LOL!!!

It was after that, that Ximin said half the people outside the room seemed to look over when I screamed. It was a consolation, I should have thought the whole bunch would look over...sigh. I had half a mind to walk out of the event. :(

Sia suay 3

Poor Lian! After we sat down at our table, I made up my mind to stay seated and not attract any more unwanted attention than I needed to. Of course, that was wishful thinking. About 3 or 4 dishes down, after taking some pictures around the table, I told Lian we should take a photo toasting our red wine. I leaned over to the other side of the table to pass the camera to Ximin, then as I reached out for my red wine..and I really didn't know how it happened, but next thing, the red wine glass was lying on its side on the table and the red wine was pouring out onto Lian's dress like a mini fountain!! It took me maybe 2 seconds to realise what was going on and to pick up the still-dripping glass immediately. It took Lian maybe another second to realise she had red wine splattered all over one of her favourite, first-time worn dinner dress! Everyone sprung into action at the table at once! Zhirong threw a clean napkin to us, Ximin was at Lian's side in an instant, and some others were grabbing tissue papers and stuff. I was looking helplessly and mumbling "Lian, Sorry! Sorry!", and then Ximin and me were racing with her to the ladies!

We were cleaning her up with paper napkins as best as we could and some of our colleagues in the ladies suggested we could use Soda water to absorb the red wine stain. I didn't know this trick. Ximin went out and in a niffy got a can from the hotel staff and we started dabbing Lian's dress with soda water again. The colleague who suggested it said "moral of the story - wear black to dinner next time!" "No...", I said somberly, "moral of the story is, don't sit next to me!" Sigh....this had to happen to me of course! I'm the infamous klutz in our gang, and knocking off chili containers, falling over table legs etc are common lunch happenings for me.

But poor Lian gotta "pay" for my sia suayness....and she was really nice enough not to rip my dress off! I would have fully deserved that! Sigh. And she said "我不知道要哭还是要笑好!" Sorry Lian! :(

But the D&D itself was super boring and sianz....hai. Maybe we should stop going next year le.

Will try to put up photos later...lazy to upload now :p

Change Doc

I finally see a "new" doc! There are numerous clinics near my home, but I have always only see two of them. For some reason, I have stopped seeing the one I considered my "family doctor". Maybe later, if......

The other doctor (let's call him H for handsome cos that's what my mum calls him LOL!) is the one I see when I decided not to see the family one, or when he is not available. Today, I'm supposed to go back to Doc H for a review after being on his antibiotics for 5 days for ear infection. But I know another visit to him will mean more antibiotics for the nose, and probably a new nasal spray, plus tons of unjustified, hard-earned money.

So I decided to visit another doc. One I did see many, many years ago, when I was in Primary 3 in fact. I only visited her that one time, when she diagnosed that I could have appendicitis after I complained of only a tummyache. I remembered totally freaking out when she told me to go back to her clinic immediately if my pain did not subside by 9pm (yes, I remembered the time even!) after taking her medicine, cos that meant she had to send me to the hospital for an operation. Imagine what that did to a nine-year old! I remembered Bro was the one who brought me to the doc then, and at 9pm, he asked me sternly, sitting by my study table, whether I still had a tummyache. I hurriedly said "no!" and he looked at me threateningly and said I had better not lied if I did. Yes, I remembered the scene very well...LOL!

So, that fateful visit was the last to that particular doctor, until today. I dun even remember whether she looked the same. I obviously can't remember how she looked already. But today, as I explained my predicament, and confided in the apparently mis-diagnosis of my "company doc" (obviously I can't tell her that the doc in question is just a few doors away from her!), she listened patiently and kindly. She checked both my ears and guess what, the infection is spreading to my other good ear, sigh... And I only mentioned that I went snorkelling and thus asked if my ear infection could be related, she asked whether I went diving and I said I only dived at the pool. She said it could be caused by diving, whether in the sea or at pool cos the changes in pressure...blah blah blah....could cause some inbalance and blah blah lead to an infection. Finally! A rational and logical doc who could tell that an ear infection and the water activities directly preceding it are related! *Relief* LOL!

Well, I spent $75 at Doc H the other day, and this nice doc today charged me $102 for antibiotic ear drops, medication for ear inflammation, some nice, hexagon-shaped pills for ear pressure and another nasal spray (she admitted I could have a sensitive nose problem after I described my blocked, but not dripping nose problem). At least I got a hose of ear medication for an ear infection!

Earache

I got some water in my right ear while I was snorkelling in Langkawi. As usual, did stupid things - was trying to turn around while snorkelling and looked behind, and somehow water just gushed into my ear. I thought it was pretty common to get water in the ears even during swimming, so thought nothing of it. I forgot all about it as it seemed to clear up by the next morning.

However, 2 days after returning home, I woke up on Tue with my right ear ringing and feeling very muffled. As if I just got water in them. And while brushing my teeth, I could hear my gurgling loud and amplified. I knew something was wrong. Got a sharp pain in my ear when I bent down to do my shoes too.

Finally went to see doc on Wednesday night. Doc put some instrument in my right ear, looked in, then said I have got a middle ear infection. Gosh, what the hell is that? Given antibiotics and a nasal decongestant spray. Doc said it's nothing to do with snorkelling or getting water in my ears. It's cos I had a sensitive nose.

For the longest time ever, this particular doc has been trying to convince me that I had a sensitive nose. Said my migraine, and dark rings around my eyes etc were all caused by it. I had spent close to $500 taking antibiotics and all kinds of nasal sprays from him, but I don't feel any different. In the first place, I don't even feel like I have a sensitive nose, or sinusitis or whatever. I know of people with sinusitis who had drippling and running noses all through the morning and would sneeze their way all through till lunch time. But the worst I ever had was a bad blocked nose. Not the running type, but as if a whole chunk of air was stuck inside...the dry kind.

So, was it just a coincidence that I got water stuck in my right ear prior to the symptoms, and yet it's got nothing whatsoever to do with it. My left ear, which was okay during my snorkelling and swimming was given a clean bill of health. Did some reading up on internet...and I think what I got is "swimmer's ear". Sigh....so all these stuff he gave me now are to treat my nose, with nothing to treat my ear. Do hope the popping and drumming in my ear would go away soon :(

Jacky

My 2nd horse-riding lesson today. I was assigned Jacky, the biggest horse in our class. He's really a black beauty. MW and me arrived early, so the trainer led Jacky and Ray, MW's horse today, into the arena first, adjusted our stirrups and told us to mount first, while waiting for the rest. One gal was absent, so there were only 4 of us today.

Compared to Sexy Girl whom I rode last week, Jacky is more steady. He sat silently and very, very still while we were waiting for the rest. So still that I could actually feel his breathing - his big tummy pushing my legs in and out with each breath. I saw that Ray was pretty good too, and was about to shout out to MW about our obedient horses when I shut myself up. I didn't want to jinx it...haha.

The trainer told us we should always find out the temperament of the horse we rode. He told me Jacky is a nice fellow, but likes things to be done in a proper way i.e. my posture should be right when I rode him, steered him the proper way, etc. Our posture is very important when we ride a horse as leaning too much forward would give them the idea that we want to go fast, and vice versa. That explains why Sexy Girl was almost jogging when I rode her last week - I was straining forward too much.

Poor Jacky, think he was kinda "tortured" by me today LOL! We did rounds around the arena today, and the same steering in and out of the orange cones placed in the middle. Trainer kept reminding me to hold the reins shorter as longer reins would not let us do proper steering. But in addition to shortening poor Jacky's reins, I held them tight in a death hold, practically for dear life. I was quite perplexed when Jacky kept stopping after a few trots, and trainer said I'm holding the reins too tight and confusing him whether I want him to walk or stop, haha!

Towards the end of the 45-min lesson, Jacky's increasing walk-stop was throwing me into a mini frenzy and I reacted by tighening his reins even more, so that he changed tactics by trying to bow his head repeatedly and almost throwing me over his head a few times - he was so strong! In the end, I realised that it was because he was reacting to my tight hold on his reins. MW told me later that I should hold the reins short, but relaxed, and not tight and taut like I had been doing the whole night, haha.

I think I did better than last lesson, at least I only whined once, after Jacky tried throwing me over his head for like the 3rd time. Rest of the time, I bit my lips and persevere on, speaking gently and firmly to Jacky the whole time. I think he's more manageable than Sexy Girl.

I got the hang of mounting - trainer said I mounted gracefully haha. But dismounting is the same clumsy story. Sigh, I hate having to slip and slide like I was falling off the horse rather than dismounting. Anyway, an enjoyable lesson on the whole. At least I got the correct size helmet this time :)

After that, we led our horses back to their stands. Along the way, Jacky kept rubbing his big nose against my hand - trainer said he liked to do that, so I stroke his cheeks and rubbed down his nose, the way I loved doing to Bollin and the other falabellas, and he responded by giving me a big jolt with his nose every now and then. Hmm...I think he do like me a little bit after all. :) And after he was back at his stand, poor Jacky let off a big pool of pee - he must have been holding on quite a while. And I think he was exhausted by my frantic attempts at holding his reins tightly, plus his own attempts to relieve my hold - he had his entire tongue hanging out of his mouth after he was back at his stand! He looked so comical - I would have taken a picture if I had my hp with me. The rest of the gals laughed when they saw him and commented that I must have torture him...haha.

We had to rotate our horses for every lesson, for us to get a feel of the different kind of horses. But I hope I get Jacky again :)

Standstill

I'm back to one of those standstills in life. What now?

My job is stable (save for having to deal with the dark forces, haha). Everything else is on a plateau now. What's next? What's there to look forward to next?
Had lunch with MH yesterday, and we talked about some stuff. And she asked me some questions which caught me off-guard. Hmm..... gal, I suppose you are right. Thanks for being honest, appreciate that wholeheartedly. You are not the first to tell me that actually. And I know it myself. Just been putting it off, putting off making a decision. Sigh....

Hate myself when I'm so wimpy and selfish. :(

I hate my boss!

Arrgghhhh!!!

More complains later!


2.40am

I'll complain next time...jus finished packing my stuff for my Langkawi trip tomorrow! *yawns*.

Funny

I have been feeling funny these few days. Can't exactly put my finger down on what's wrong. Just....unease, uptight and as if, there is some suspense hanging in the air. Suspense over what's to come, and what's to come is not a good thing.

Maybe I'm going to get H1N1 soon...

Horse-riding lesson

Went for my first horse-riding lesson at Gallop Stables with MW today. I had been looking forward to it all week. Only thing was, both of us didn't expect things to turn out the way they did.

Having had all those experience with Falabellas, we both thought we would manage fine, more so than the rest of the other 3 gals in our class, I secretly thought. Ha, as usual...I ended up being the very sia suay one.

MW was the first to be allocated her horse - Rocky. He's a tall, dark and sturdy horse. But he was very fidgety, and even before the lesson started, MW started to freak out already as she could not hold on to him well. My horse was Sexy Girl, a pretty and tall mare. I went over to 培养感情 with her first, LOL! She seemed pretty friendly and only occasionally stamped her hooves at the irritating flies swamping around them.

Our class was slightly delayed as all the horsies except Sexy Girl had on their protective leg coverings (not sure what's it called). It's supposed to prevent abrasion on their legs and hooves when they walked. So we had to wait for someone to bring new ones down for her.

When we finally got started, each of us had to lead our own horse to the training arena. our trainer is a jovial Indian guy and he explained the various equipment in saddling a horse - the stirrups, saddle, girth, reins. We then had to adjust the stirrups to suit our leg length. Finally, we mounted our horses one by one. Once we were up there, I started to panic a little. Worse, every time Sexy Girl started to bend her huge head to swipe at the flies at her hooves, I panic and whined...haha. I think MW and me were the noisiest and uncool students of them all. Shame on us, for all our experiences and knowledge of horses especially falabellas...sigh.

Then we were taught to walk our horses round and round the arena. Pulling the reins to the left to walk them left, right to the right, and to stop, to rein in the reins tightly on both sides. We then learn steering by walking them in and out, left and right through those orange stand thingy that the trainer placed in the middle of the arena. It's those same things people placed on parking lots to learn parallel parking...what's it called huh?

There was a Caucasian girl helping us to cope in our class. She's an advanced rider with the school and has been riding since she was 4. Guess how old she is now? With all due respect, I thought she was in her early 20s or maybe at least late teens. She sounded so mature and confidence and so good with all the horses. Arica is only 12!!! My goodness...

Anyway, MW and me were whining so much that the trainer stationed himself beside MW and Rocky, while Arica walked next to Sexy Girl while I rode her. Sigh, a 12-year old gal supervising an auntie!

After we walked for about 10-15 minutes, our trainer made us do a little "exercise". We had to swing our legs around the horse - to the side, facing its back and back to the front again. This is to show the trainer how comfortable we are on our saddle. Then finally, we were taught how to dismount. I had a little problem with this and tried to convince Arica to let me keep one leg on the stirrup while I swing the other one over. She shook her head vehemently and said I would be stuck on one stirrup! Sigh, so very awkwardly, I clambered down Sexy Girl in a most uncool fashion!

One lesson over! Some things I must do at the next lesson to enjoy my class more - make sure I get a larger helmet. Arica was nice enough to lend me her personal one after I couldn't find one that fits. But it was still much too small and I ended up with a headache. I must also lengthen my stirrups more - my legs felt like they were cuddling Sexy Girl too much.

And most of all - I made up my mind NOT TO WHINE even if Sexy Girl decided to throw me off her back!!! Throughout the lesson, I kept telling myself that if I'm going to be running a farm in future, I must ride well! I want to imagine myself on my own personal horse, cantering round my sheep with my border collies running round me!! With that picture in my head, I pulled the reins tight and made up my mind that Sexy Girl will like me well enough not to scare me with sudden jerky movements by the next lesson :)

Overall, I enjoyed my lesson tremendously despite the fear, panic and whining. :)

Roy took this pic of me and Sexy Girl (a bit blur though) :) See, my stirrups are too short!

Dance in the rain

Got this in the email today and thought I would share.


Dance in the Rain

It was a busy morning, about 8:30, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's arrived at the hospital to have stitches removed from his thumb. He said he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am. I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would be able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound. On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, Iasked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry.

The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife. I inquired as to her health.

He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer's Disease.
As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was late.

He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, 'And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?'

He smiled
As he patted my hand and said,

'She doesn't know me,
But I still know her.'

I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought,

'That is the kind of love I want in my life..'

True love is neither Physical, nor romantic.

True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

The happiest people don 't necessarily have the best of everything; They just make the best of what they have.

'Life isn't about how to survive the storm,

But how to dance in the rain.